Judging Favorably: The lesson we can learn from Aharon and Miriam
A well-known question asked about this week's parsha is, "What exactly was Miriam punished for?"
Rashi shares that Miriam had commiserated with Tzipora, Moshe's wife, after Moshe had separated from her to grow closer to Hashem.
It is an every day matter that we ask people we're close to about the behavior of others. "Do you think he did the right thing?" or perhaps, "How would you have acted in such a situated?"
In essence, it can be said that Miriam was simply "bouncing something off of" Aharon, seeing what he had to say.
But in essence, when we look at Hashem's response, we can infer that the conversation Aharon and Miriam had had, in of itself, was not the problem.
Rather, the Torah itself interjects right after the verse about Aharon and Miriam's forbidden speech, "Now Moses was a very humble man, more so than any other man on earth."
Thus, lies the secret, perhaps. Miriam was right to speak to Aharon, but her presumption that there was no way to explain his behavior, i.e. his separation from his wife, whereas they, Aharon and Miriam had not done so, was errant, because after all, Moshe's humility could have been fertile ground for seeing the good, or positive, in Moshe's actions.
Why was Miriyam right in speaking to Aharon about Moshe? What, exactly, was the to'eleth in doing so? Tzipora was distraught because Moshe had separated from her because he had to be constantly ritually pure so that he could accept any immediate visitation from HaShem. This was Moshe's idea to separate, but Tzipora lost. Tzipora felt bad for the wives of Moshe's 2 brothers, Eldad & Medad since THEY, TOO, had begun prophesizing. Tzipora told Miriyam about those bad feelings, but why did Miriyam think she had the right to tell anyone else about Tzipora's words? Miriyam told Aharon that Moshe had separated from Tzipora. Why? Can I go tell other people about something in YOU that I think is distressing? HaShem's responses was to "visit" Aharon & Miriyam when they were spiritually impure from tashmish, forcing them to cry out for water to purify themselves to be able to participate in HaShem's visitation, while demonstrating to them that Moshe did NOT have that problem. I'm wondering that HaShem allows the erasing of His Name in the case of a sotah for the SAKE of saving a marriage, but He doesn't allow visitation rights with people after they've performed marital duties. It could be that this is because His Presence is more important than His Name.
ReplyDeleteB"H
ReplyDeleteit is better to be thought of as a bearer of lashon harah, than to opens one mouth a remove all doubt.
my goal is not to say anything about a 3rd party to a 2nd party.
good Shabbos! good Shabbos!! good Shabbos!!!
If you look at the narrative structure, I think a simple reading conforms to my understanding. At first it says Miriam spoke. Then, it says that both Aharon and Miriam spoke - even though Aharon didn't say a thing. And then, before Hashem chastises Aharon and Miriam, the Torah pipes in and offers commentary about the events that had transpired, a very rare occurrence in the biblical narrative, namely to state that Moshe was the humblest of all men. Humility, in its purest form is recognizing one's strengths and abilities, and putting them into practice. Thus, Moshe's separation from his wife, comments Hashem, stemmed from a profound sense of humility, his cognizance that for him that was the best approach.
ReplyDeleteNow, Chazal do not state that Moshe did the right thing. Rather, they say that after Moshe took that bold decision, Hashem accepted it, but there is no mention in Chazal that Hashem would have asked Moshe to make such a far-reaching move; it's not natural, anomalous to our faith, which is perhaps why Miriam and Aharon struggled so much to understand Moshe's behavior.
As to the extent that Miriam's flaw was communicating confidential information, I've seen no mention of that, nor do I think the text corroborates it. It's not Hashem's criticism or rebuke of Aharon and Miriam, but rather, "..How could you have the audacity to speak against my servant, Moshe?" Were there to have been a positive purpose, evidenced by Aharon and Miriam's willingness to see the good, or rational in Moshe's behavior, it would have been deemed, in my humble opinion, "speaking against my servant, Moshe," but rather, something edifying and constructive, meant to help Moshe Rabbeinu. I don't want to sound heretical, but if it had been handled differently, Moshe may have even decided to return to his wife, but don't quote me on that:)