Forgiving One's Self

There's something about Yom Kippur that evokes joy year in and year out, a feeling of purity as we return to our roots. It's not just that erev Yom Kippur is the most lucrative day of the year for bike stores, people en masse turning off their engines the following day, as the whole nation relives the service of the Cohen Gadol in the Beit Hamikdash. A feeling truly overcomes, seemingly, each and every person, a sense that the year behind us was as good as it could have been, and the year ahead, with Sukkot around the corner, bringing in a reconnection to nature, organic growth, and the world around us. 

That, in essence, is the meaning of Sukkot, to return to nature, and to realize that Hashem is the only one who can envelop us in the plenty the world has to offer. The rain is the source of life itself, and without it, no life, neither here, nor on Mars, could survive. Sukkot is the time when we are judged for water, the symbolic embodiment of livelihood; everything around us is rooted in water, and growth, except for salt and water, far from a subsistence in of its own. 

Thus, as we look forward in the waning hours to Yom Kippur, it is important to ask how we can best ready ourselves for Yom Kippur, and the simplest answer I can offer is the recognition that we were not made to be perfect; a machine that comes off of the assembly line with a glitch - or flaw - is reason for a recall. A human being who is perfect should be recalled, and has no place in this world. Thus, cognitively, and mentally, with this conception of a person who is consciously imperfect, we can best try to forgive ourselves. Realizing that no person is meant to be perfect, that some of the greatest Jewish leaders made the biggest mistakes, can vest us with the understanding that when we stand before God on Yom Kippur - like Rav Carlebach says, during ne'ilah we enter God's inner chambers and lock the door only for us -  we can be honest. We can be transparent, entirely open, in a way that is entirely transformative. Only that honesty can reset a relationship, honesty, integrity, and the realization that given that God knows everything, there is nothing to lose, or to hide. 

A beautiful new year!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

No More Mr. Nice Guy

Parshat Kdoshim makes us think twice about how we treat people who are mean to us. "You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against members of your people. Love your fellow man as yourself: I am Hashem." The sages teach that taking a revenge takes the following pattern. One man asks his fellow man to lend him a sickle because his has broken and he needs to harvest his wheat and trim the weeds that threaten his wheat. His friend says no. A month later the same scenario plays out, just this time, the one who refused needs one himself. His friend says no. Why, he asks himself, would he lend his friend a sickle if his friend didn't lend him one? The rationale even makes sense. In the business world, there's a new term, "coopetition," companies usually do compete but sometimes cooperate for their mutual benefit. The thinking makes sense when it comes to the nitty gritty of human relations; Nobel Prize winner, Professor Israel Aumann talks about w...
Read more

Can Moshe Have Misheard God?

Sometimes we hear something, but we don't really hear what has been said. Or, we understand a message differently from how it was intended. That was what happened in this past week's parsha, Shemini, when Moshe's wrath flared against Aharon's sons, Elazar and Itamar for not eating the he-goat of their sin offering. He chastised them. "Hashem gave it to you to procure forgiveness for the community's sin and to atone on their behalf before Hashem. Its blood was not brought into the sanctuary within; it should have been eaten in the holy domain as I had commanded." For a little bit of background, for Aharon HaCohen, it had been a fraught day to say the least; Elazar and Itamar's older brothers, Nadav and Avihu, had been eaten alive in a heavenly flame that took their lives but left their bodies intact. Moshe commanded Mishael and Elzaphan, their cousins, to then remove them by their tunics and place them outside of the camp. The day, in essence, ha...
Read more

What if God Was One of Us

The answer is, it would be pretty darn bad.  This week's parsha speaks to four different situations where one accidentally sins, and the consequent atonement process.  On Shabbat, a friend asked me, "Why does the verse  say, ' When a chieftain (i.e. leader) sins, unwittingly bearing guilt by performing an act Hashem has commanded him not to do (Vayikra 4:22)..?' Why doesn't the Torah say " If " like it says for all of the other transgressors, 'If the annointed priest sins...If the high assembly sins...If a layman sins..?' What distinguishes between the Nasi or tribal chief, or head of Israel, and every other potential sinner'"? I told him, "You see, it's like the expression, ' She'elat Chacham, Chatzi Teshuva ' (the question of a wise person, is already half the answer). A person who has to lead others, will inevitably get his hands dirty." You can't lead without making mistakes, you can't be human withou...
Read more